REVISIONING

ITHIS IS MY WRITING PROCESS
The original part of my dream went like this. 

Hello God. My name is Grant.  I really shouldn't be here and I really shouldn't be doing this.  but I want to pray on behalf of the human race.  Please take care of us.  I am from the Uniting Church in Brisbane.  I hav been to Tibetan monasteries, I have been to Aen temples, I've only been here a few times before.  but please have mercy upon all of us.  Please have mercy upon my race.  My wife is from Japan I am from Australia.  My brother's wife is from China.  He is a scientist.  So whatever it is that you believe in, I believe in life.  I know people from many places

*  I knocked on the door, and at first there was no answer
*  Finally the door slid openand I left my wife outside as I prayed alone on behalf of the human race. 
*  I looked around at all of the icons and looked across to the single candle in whose light they were all lit. 
*  The room was quite dark and lit by a single candle and the little natural light that penetrated the church.


I observed the beautiful icons that stooped down to the level of my poor understanding.  All of the single icons seemed to tell a single story of God in all his mercy acting eternally in friendship with all of creation.  I quietly ackmowledged the presence of the saints with whom I was familiar.  Then I kneeled down to say a prayer that went something like this...

Having tired long before I was ... okay what happens next. 

now sitting in a cross legged posture and I gingerly got to my feet. 

The priest and his wife were understanding of my apparant madness.  Perhaps they saw the smallest touch of God in it.  That's one of the earlier meanings, when somneone said that someone was "touched".  The world sees such people as afflicted with madness.  Throughout the ages...
etc the Church...
Tibetan Buddhism...
One also thinks of Sufism....
Zen... hard to understand... Hakuen, the founder of the Rinzai sect claimed to be the father of the child of a single mother.  At the time, that would have been the source of great shame.  For this reason, Hakuen (Hakuin) said that he had fathered the child.  He was a truly blameless one.  His autobiography is called Wild Ivy, its published by Shambhala.  I have it at my parents house in Australia.  I just remember the story from a different source and it always struck me as one of the closest parallels there was to Christianity.  Its a truuly beautiful story.  His writinf is renowned, according to Norman Waddell, the translator, as being particularly harsh.  He just wanted to lessen the hypocrasy of the priesthood of the time.
Then I talk about Boo Radley, and To Kill a Mockingbird.  The main message of that book is to try to always put oneself in the other person's shoes.  Its about empathy, really... Reimagining other people's lives as one's own.  That's what I have always had to do, even as a kid, because I just coukdn't understand why people actethe way they did.  It was either that or be swallowed up by anger. 
Then I leave the Church, and see a guy who reminds me of someone I knew.  He wore the face of shame.  Why?  Because he had lived overseas, and had understood that culture and wanted to be a part of it, had fluent English, liked me but was too busy to answer my phone calls.  He didn't return my messages, or call me back.  But he was probably just too busy, so that's okay.

Then I wrote about hanami in the park, how it looked like it was for families.  I was happy for them and blessed their picnic and this concept....

I saw a kind of impromptu hanami party For those of you who don't know, hanami is a special event in Japan.  It celebrates the sakura which is avery special tree, that only flowers for two weeks every year.  For me, and I thi k this is why its celebrated, this is symbolic of the brevity of life.  How we are here one day and gone tomorrow, even if we live into our eighties.  Within a scientific viewpoint, we all kind of come together as the result of circumstances of so many other things that have existed almost into perpetuity, are here for a day, and then die as human beings and disappear into other less concious things.  This is very Buddhist, too.  Within Christiabity there is a  book called Between the Dreaming and the Coming True by Robert Benson, which talks about the pre-existance of the soul.  In life, these things are called mysteries.  What happens before and after we die?  I don't know.  We know what happened in the between though.  Those things can be recorded.  Thats one reason why I am not so afraid of death- of course, I'm terrified of it- but I am more afraid of living a shell of a life, and thta is all to do with integrity and honour.

Then I talked about all of the fetes, how most people think they are run by unsavoury customers.  I would like to think of them though as the Bivble would see them, as some of the people Jesus loved the most, the people who were less hypocritical and basically human in their weaknesses.  They are individuals belonging to families born on the other side of the street.  Because that's what they are.  Moneyed no doubt but more or less mainstream Japanese society sees them as tax collectors and prostitutes of Jesus time were seen.  So I blessed these quiet revellers.

Then I saw three Western looking guys who I thought I recognised.  I said, "If anyone here today wore the face of shame please make sure that good things happen for him."  I am thinking of a man called Ike.  Shame is a big thing for Japanese people.  "I hope he gets slomething good out of this.  Find him for me please.  ask him what he wants.  No, sorry, don't do that.  Ask his wife what he needs."

Do you know what the middle man said to me.  I'll give you a hint (2) (3) (4) (8),
That's right.  He said, "We all make mistakes." 

Then I got to the hospital I gesticulated to turn these lights off, this madness has to stop.  Then we got safe passage, entered back through the front entrance, and crossed the road again.  I blessed the greenery and prayed for its success.  Then I prayed for all of the small businesses and local shops.  Tried to make the people of Japan feel proud... But before we did along the way I passed some rough looking yoiung toughs, like yankees who scowled at me.  I intimated to them that I meant no harm and I truly understaood.  We got home, ate two chocolates.  I thought someone could poison us with chocolates.  So I waited for Satoko to eat first, then I ate second.  Like Romeo and Juliet.  Starts Adam and Eve ends in Romeo and Juliet going to sleep, wondering if its for the last time but knowing that kif they did they had gone to a churc, seen a picnic, blessed the streets and all the little people, tried to install pride into Japanese people, tried to strighten the shouldres, to walk tall so others can do the same, ate two chocolates and lived a day of sacrifice and love.

Thats how I want to see the world, as crazy and idealistic as it sounds.  I've been showing my writing process.  Tomorrow I will share with you "I dream of Uluru," which I think is avery special and complete short story.